Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Random Ramblings

Thanks for the t-shirt orders. Keep them coming!

I don't really feel like organizing my thoughts right now so I will just make a list of thoughts/questions/ramblings.

- Our agency told us today that the earliest we should expect to hear anything is March. We are looking at about another month before we hear anything regarding our case.
- I am bummed about that news and am praying that they are wrong.
- I know that some of you think that March is right around the corner. 
- I hate wishing time away.  I know that I should enjoy the here and now.  But honestly, I am ready to fast forward to the day when we are officially Baby B's parents and are introducing him to his big brothers and sister.
- We visited the Little Guy the exact same weekend we visited Blake in 2008. With Blake our documents were not submitted to court until March 23. It would appear that we would be over a month ahead of where we were last time. I should take great comfort in that. I am finding myself being unsettled though and want to go back NOW!
- We want to return to Russia so bad our heart hurts.  At the same time we have so much anxiety about leaving Brady, Madison, and Blake for 25+ days.
- Do you know that the judge can assign you a court date right away or he/she legally has 60 days to let your documents sit on his/her desk before even reviewing your documents?
-Has anyone had a male judge oversee their Russian adoption? I have only heard of female judges. (random thought - I know!)
- Do you know that sometimes there is a pre-hearing that is done between the judge, prosecutor, orphanage representative, and the agency facilitator if the judge requests one?
- I am tired of relishing in my own disappointment. I know there are so many others that have it 'worse' off than I. I know that we are blessed and so fortunate. I want to turn the corner and put an end to these negative emotions that are running wild inside of me.
- I know God is in control and His timing will be perfect for our family. I just can't stand when people try to derail or postpone His plan!  I still struggle with not knowing the timing of the plan.  I am still a major work in progress and am thankful for God's grace and patience.
- Do you know that most of the other thoughts I have right now are not appropriate to post on this blog?  :o)

I think I need to take a deep breath and remember slowly, surely, steadily... we WILL be reunited with our son!

Wow - I feel better just typing this out!  Good therapy session!!


Masha said...

Talk it out! :) I know I get caught up in the overwhelming emotions too but must say I am very thankful for your words of wisdom along the way. When someone else puts it in perspective, it just makes me stop and think. While I know what *I* want, *I* did and *I* am prepared for, tough to admit it isn't about me nor is it something I have control over and ohhhh how I love control. Considering the hair, I bet you don't deviate from that stubbornness either! :) I have taken that slowly, steadily, surely to heart very much but in today's world of email, blackberries, everything with an app kind of world, time seems to move even slower when waiting.

I do hope that you get news sooner than you anticipate only so that suffering is eased but it is eerie that you visited Blake the same weekend and perhaps have a course you don't get know. Fingers crossed!!!

PS: I shouldn't say a lot of the things I want but still have to self-censor a lot on my blog because not as sweet as I seem. :D

Gloria said...

I am hoping that you hear sooner than your agency expects you to. I have never heard of any male judges in Vlad. Do you know if you have a male judge? Hopefully your judge will not wait the 60 days to look at your paperwork. I remember this wait like it was yesterday and I know that it is the hardest time and the most difficult to understand. We are praying for you guys.

Sabrina and Giorgio said...

One thing I admire about you (and there are many) is that you have the ability to be honest with yourself about how you feel. You are an action-oriented person and when things are not in our control, we tend to want to do things to move them along. If we're already in mid-February, then most likely you will hear something early March in a few weeks. Maybe that's optimistic that but that's my prediction. See, I'm already moving up your timeline for you! :-)

Joel and Clarion said...

Hey Guys! Those of us who have been through this before (and even those in it for the first time) know exactly how you feel. I've been thinking the same things. Like you, we're ahead of where we were in our last adoption, way ahead in fact. If I were to compare the speeds, this adoption is light speed compared to last time. Still, we're impatient and time seems to drag on and on. Your friends, family, and fellow adoptive families are here for you. And you're right, the Lord's timing is perfect. From reading Sabrina & Giorgio's blog, it sounds like there are a lot of families in Vlad right now. Adoptions must really be booming there, which probably slows things down for many of us. But the good news is that the god Lord is providing families for all of these precious little ones. That's what's happening while we all wait. I like to think that the wait is long because lots of children are being brought together with their families. Your family and ours are just a couple of them. Our time will come! Our heavenly Father knows our needs, and most of all the needs of these little ones. We're praying for you!

Ursula said...

I think writing about your journey, the good times and the challenging times is very cathartic. Hang in there!!!!

Jody said...

Oh how familiar that list looks!! Praying that you'll hear something before your agency thinks you will. That can happen, you know!!!

Jen Grant said...

Good for you for writing it all down and getting it all out. Praying for you!!